When children are caught in the middle of a disagreement, their big feelings can quickly turn into arguments, frustration, or shutdowns. That’s where The Page of Buts comes in - a simple, powerful resource designed to support conflict resolution through self-expression, emotional validation, and calm communication.
This printable page provides a safe, non-judgmental space for children to write down what they want to say, especially in moments when talking it out feels too hard. By redirecting their emotional energy into writing or drawing, children are encouraged to pause, reflect, and feel heard, without escalating conflict.
About This Resource
The Page of Buts invites children to complete open-ended sentences like:
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“But I wanted to…”
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“But I feel…”
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“But I thought…”
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“But it’s not fair because…”
These prompts help children express their frustration, perspective, and unmet needs in a structured way. Afterward, adults can review and discuss what was written, providing an opportunity for calm conflict resolution, validation, and problem-solving, while modelling respectful communication.
Features
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Provides space to write, draw, or dictate thoughts
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Designed for home, school, therapy, or any setting where emotions can run high
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Can be used in the moment or as part of a follow-up conversation
Benefits
- De-escalates conflict by giving children a structured outlet for their frustration
- Promotes emotional literacy and teaches children to identify and express feelings
- Helps children feel heard, reducing the likelihood of shutdowns or outbursts
- Encourages reflection, empathy, and problem-solving
- Strengthens communication between children and caregivers or educators
- Supports independence in managing big emotions and disagreements
- Useful for neurodiverse children who may struggle to process or verbalise emotions during stress
How to Use
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Introduce the Page of Buts and explain that this tool is here to help them share their feelings safely during disagreements.
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Offer it during or after conflict as an alternative to shouting, arguing, or shutting down.
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Let the child write, draw, or dictate their “buts”—the thoughts they may not feel able to say out loud.
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Once completed, read through the page together, validating their feelings and thanking them for expressing themselves.
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Discuss solutions, compromises, or next steps in a calm and respectful way.
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Reassure the child that all feelings are welcome, but it’s how we express them that matters.
Ideas for Use
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During sibling or peer arguments to redirect emotional energy into reflection
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In classrooms as a conflict resolution strategy or calm corner resource
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With neurodivergent children who benefit from processing emotions visually or in writing
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In therapy or social skills sessions to model structured emotional expression
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At home during meltdowns, disagreements, or moments of frustration
The Page of Buts is a calming, supportive resource that helps children pause, reflect, and express themselves during or after moments of conflict. By giving children a voice, without shouting or shutting down, it encourages emotional awareness, strengthens relationships, and promotes peaceful problem-solving.
Download now and turn emotional outbursts into meaningful conversations.
